Am I such a lousy/boring friend that even when I'm beside you, you refused to talk to me; or have nothing to talk to me about?

And only when you see me pulling a face then you approach me and start talking?

Then what's the difference between church friends and schoolmates?

I can find schoolmates who'll treasure me more than you do.

Why should I go when no one's concerned or don't even bother to talk to me?

Don't you realise that I always stick around you because I feel that no one there really has the intention of making me feel so accepted and comfortable?

I feel so stupid. Maybe I placed my hopes on the wrong person...

You said you care and will always be there for me.

But I see an irony in your words and action.

If you'd care, then you'll look forward to meeting me, talking to me, and ensure that I stay happy at all times.

I interacted with you through actions yet time and time again you ignored me.

Is it because I'm just so different and uncool or do not grow up the same way as you do?

Maybe you really believe that you and I have nothing in common.

Despite your hectic schedule, you always make time for the friends you grew up with, but not me.

If I were to put it in a harsh way, you were never truly there for me before.

If you were, then I wouldn't be in this state.

Let's put it this way. I get to meet you at most twice a week. Instead of spending quality time with me, you exclusively seem to want to spend time with your childhood friends only when you meet up with them so frequently.

I feel mad depressed about life. Why is it that every time the people who're so precious to me will somehow become distant?

And that people whom I consider acquaintance are there for me though I choose not to become close friends with them?

Maybe cause I'm just so unlucky and suay to not have any close friends...

If you ever de-friend me, you'll be the 4th person. I feel miserable. I need someone who'll stand by me at all times.

Neither do I want anyone including you, after reading this post to start or pretend to care for me because that'll only show how insensitive you are. Prevention's better than cure. Why didn't you make the effort while I gave you the chance to? The thing is, why put me through this again and again? If you'd read my entries, you would have guessed my expectations and have no one tell you what to do.

But also, who am I to have expectations of you? I just thought ... maybe I came for the wrong purpose.

This is the time where the crucial decision comes in. Just within a week, I've seen the worst of the politics. This person accusing me that I said her shoes were ugly when in actual fact I said it was nice. I don't know whether she's deaf or something. And she didn't even apologise after that. Deep down, I know that I'm not mature, but shouldn't this be done for basic EQ and courtesy?

Say anything like I'm this terrible person who wants things to go my way and that I come to conclusions so easily. Just for your information only if you did care. And I just felt like I missed out so much in life because of people like you. Thanks (:

Hi. I am sooooooooo TIRED from school work and projects. I can barely feel my eyes opening. I need my 14 hours sleep again. 

Today was epic. Got myself a cut and a bruise in the gym due to carelessness. But the main highlight of the day was that Dalvin dared me to take a bite of the chilli padi in her fried rice. Knowing me, I cannot stand any type of spices for nuts.  But being the brave boy, I chewed every single piece of it. 

The spiciness only hit me after the food in my mouth was gone. And I swear it's damn damn damn damn hotttttttt!! Then there was this stingy feeling biting my tongue for like 10 to 15 minutes. Can't believe the retention value of a chilli padi's so high. It was super unbearable and I had to drink and store the ice lemon tea in my mouth again and again. Whenever I opened my mouth, and air gets in, it'll hurt like crap. So I had to keep drinking non-stop until I felt better.

I can't fathom how people can manage to just eat the chilli padi alone when it's so spicy! Super crazy. 

Kay, but I always want to experience new things whether good or bad. I love DARES. But maybe next time try out something else, no more chilli padi!